The firing squad

4 stars

Pirate Pete had been captured by a Spanish general and sentenced to death by his 50-man firing squad.

Pete cringed, as he knew their reputation for being the worst firing squad in the Spanish military. They were such bad shots that they would often all miss their targets and simply maim their victims, leaving them to bleed to death, as the general’s tradition was to only allow one shot per man to save on ammunition. The thought of a slow painful death made Pete beg for mercy.

"Very well, I have some compassion. You may choose where the men stand when they shoot you and I will add 50 extra men to the squad to ensure someone will at least hit you. Perhaps if they stand closer they will kill you quicker, if you’re lucky,” snickered the general. "Oh, and just so you don’t get any funny ideas, they can’t stand more than 20 ft away, they must be facing you, and you must remain tied to the post in the middle of the yard. And to show I’m not totally heartless, if you aren’t dead by sundown I’ll release you so you can die peacefully outside the compound. I must go now but will return tomorrow and see to it that you are buried in a nice spot, though with 100 men, I doubt there will be much left of you to bury.”

After giving his instructions the general left. Upon his return the next day, he found that Pete had been set free alive and well. “How could this be?” demanded the general. “It was where Pete had us stand,” explained the captain of the squad.

Where did Pete tell them to stand?


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Pete told them to stand in a circle around him. All the squad was facing in at Pete, ready to shoot, when they realized that everyone who missed would likely end up shooting another squad member. So no one dared to fire, knowing the risk. Thus at sundown he was released.
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he had them stand in a line in front of him
- (2 May 2009)

Peter asks them to form a circle arount him
- Black Rose (7 May 2009)

Pete told the squad to form a circle around him. Facing each other and being such notoriously bad shots, the squad members were more likely to hit each other than Pete. By sundown, not a single shot had been fired.

- courtney (23 Jun 2009)

i think he had them form two rows; one in front of him & one behind him they were all still facing him & could see him but were directly across from each other.
- lisa (25 Sep 2009)

he spend the entire time fussing over where they should stand not a single shoot as fired
- (18 Nov 2009)

Each of the squad stands right in front of him face to face!
- Ed Leung (12 Dec 2009)

He had them stand off to the side as he walked away. He was told he would be released by sundown. The general left and returned the next day. Although the general meant the next sundown, he only said by sundown.
- Mara (28 Jan 2010)

Stand directly in front of him say, 1 inch, the rifle is too long that the rifle barrel is past him when they shoot.
- chris (31 Jan 2010)

He had them stand about fiftten feet away to the lft, where, for some reason, a black hole was situated. As no light or matter can exist within a black hole, the Firing squad all died
- Generosity (2 Mar 2010)

He called Chuck Norris and as the firing squad each took their shot, Chuck karate chopped it out of the air...
- Booyah (15 Mar 2010)

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